Kiev Spring 2000 Bible School Report by Dr. Peter Kim Kiev UBF Director

Spring came to Kiev, too. At last we could take off our heavy black winter coats and breathe the wonderful aroma of spring as we gave our strength to preparing our Easter Bible Conference. On April 21-23 we held our Easter Bible Conference in a conference place located in a beautiful suburb of Kiev. Through this conference we experienced the great grace of God and the power of the resurrection. First, we experienced the power of prayer. We prayed all together for 70 attendants, but 75 came. Second, our joy was unbounded when Sister Anna experienced the great salvation of Jesus. I want to share in more detail the great grace of God that we experienced through this conference.

At our fall conference we had prayed for 100 members. But only 67 attended. Because of this failure, we began to pray earnestly all together. Of course, numbers are not the most important, but we wanted to learn faith, so we set our goal at 70 attendants and began to pray earnestly all together. Most of our shepherds are graduate students who were trying to finish their research papers before the end of the term. So they were very busy. However, we said to ourselves, "As Jesus' servants, should we not work for our Lord to the point of fainting at least one time in our lives?" We encouraged each other with these words and started preparing the Easter Conference about a month. Before the conference we began two prayer meetings each day 9 p.m. We met and memorized Bible verses and prayed earnestly to the Lord. Our Kiev shepherds are so poor that many times they cannot even eat three meats a day, but through this time of united prayer they remembered Jesus who worked hard when there was nothing to work with, and once made mud with spit to heal the man born blind. They decided to overcome the present reality and work for the Lord with what they had. Our shepherd's parents gave up everything in order to be good communists. So they left only poverty as their children's inheritance. Our young shepherds realized that if they do not overcome the present dark reality, their children would have no hope and will only curse their parents. So in order to be parents who are not cursed by their children, they decided to take responsibility for their own time and history, and they prepared this conference in that spirit. Every morning and evening, between twenty and twenty-five brothers and sisters participated in prayer meetings. Sometimes they prayed until after midnight, holding hands and praying earnestly. God heard our broken hearted prayers and began to pour out his blessings. Through prayer fear was dispelled and confidence began to fill our hearts. At first, we prayed with mosquito-like voices. Later, we prayed in loud voices with frequent interjections of "Amen!" God's word to Abraham came to us: "Look up at the heavens and count the stars - if indeed you can count them. So your offspring be." God poured his vision into our hearts. Each of us made a decision to wittingly pay the price for the sake of this vision. Great hope and conviction filled our hearts "If I, one person, am changed by the Gospel and hold back nothing in the service of Christ, the season of Christ will surely come to our land." With this hope and vision from God we prepared this Easter conference with one mind and heart.

It is expensive to have a conference. The registration fee for the conference was not a small amount, of money for poor students. It amounts to about one month's wages. But at every meeting we reminded ourselves of our Lord's words "You give them something to eat." We shouted, "Let's not be with hands stretched out to get something. Let's extend our hands to give. It is more to give than to receive. We are created in the image of God the King. We are royal priests. We are doing a million dollars business. How can we be afraid of losing a few dollars?" Each one was determined to be responsible for his conference fee. When we prepared in this spirit, 45 students registered fully on their own. I want to report on several beautiful things that happened as we prayed together and encouraged the students to pay their own conference fees.

1) Joan of Arc, Oksana (Physics 5). Shepherdess Joan of Arc tried again and again to raise her conference fee. She finally went to her home and met her parents who were working so hard in the field just to survive. She cried so much when she saw their hard work that she came back without asking them for money. I knew their circumstances so well. I wanted so much to pay for all of them. But when I thought about the future of this land, I denied my own feelings and prayed to God who is the Owner of all things to supply the material things that these precious sheep needed. When I prayed, Joan of Arc overcame her human sympathy for her mother and invited her mother to the conference and served her with the word of God and with prayer. In her testimony she confessed that although she loved her mother, for the sake of God's hope for herself and for her nation, she must walk the road of a disciple of Jesus. So, in the hope that God would use her in the future to save her nation, we began to call Oksana "Joan of Arc.''

2) Vladimir Levitsky (Physics 5). He is a student shepherd, and he is in the process of writing his graduation dissertation. He delivers newspapers in order to support himself. But every day he visited the campus, prayed and invited sheep. I was afraid that he would indeed faint, and several times I told him to stop and rest. But he comforted me, saying, "Don't worry, I must invite even one more person to this heavenly banquet. I have a lot more strength left.'' And he grabbed my arm with a strong grip. He began a new history by inviting 13 students to the conference.

3) Bulldozer Oksana (Kiev Engineering College, Chemistry 5). She is preparing for her marriage to Shepherd Vladimir Levitsky at the end of May. She could have fallen into romantic daydreaming. But I gave her the name "Bulldozer" and challenged her to work hard. She gave her whole heart to struggle for the of one sheep's salvation. When she did so, the Spirit of God began to work in her heart. She met many girls who were so smooth and fancy. She finally remembered the grace of Jesus who patiently helped her even though she was like a Samaritan woman. Her heart was sore because, while Shepherd Vladimir brought so many sheep, she was not to successfully fish even one. So she to think, "What can I do for Jesus?" She thought of the woman who broke her alabaster jar and poured out the perfume on Jesus. Then she decided that she could break her alabaster jar of money saved for her wedding and put down a new carpet on the floor of the center. The center is 100 sq. meters, and the cost of a carpet is about $600. This amount of money is the equivalent of $6000 to an American. I wondered if I should let her do this, but then I decided to accept her noble act and her sincerity to the Lord and bless her. When the new carpet was put down, everyone was so happy. We didn't even eat lunch, but jumped and danced and rotted around on the new carpet, praising the Lord. Thanks are to God for the beautiful act of sacrifice of his young girl.

4) Shepherdess Anastasia (Physics 5), Anastasia is a precious jewel of our Kiev UBF. I have never met a girl with such a pure and beautiful heart. She and Missionary Kyung Sun were responsible for the music program for the conference. They provided beautiful and graceful music. One day while we were preparing the conference, an urgent message came to her from her home. Her sister has been sick with a kind of paralysis, and the message that came was that her condition had become critical. She loved her sister and could have dropped everything and gone home. But by faith she decided to depend on God the Author of life. She served sheep even more diligently and prayed for her sister. When she did this, her sister got well and even attended the conference and sang a special song. God blessed the faith of this shepherdess. She the one who invited Anna, the suicidal sheep who repented and whose life and soul saved, Anna had already decided to kill herself and was determined not to come to the conference. Anastasia did not give up. Every day she visited her and prayed with tears persistently for her. Finally, Anaa's heart was moved. She changed her mind and decided to come. At the '99 MSU conference, Shepherdess Oksana was rejected when she applied for a visa. Anastasia met the Consular next for her visa interview. She pied with the consul officer to give a visa to Oksana-saying nothing about her own visa. The callused officer was moved by her beautiful heart and gave visas to both of them. She is a beautiful woman who can lie down her life for her friend,

The age of these shepherdesses is 22-24. It is the time for young girls to really have a good time in a pleasure-seeking life style. But these girls love Jesus with pure hearts and have given themselves to him. When I look at them I see the bright future of the Ukraine I can see the hope of God for this land. While we prepared this conference I realized that God wants real faith, even if it is only as small as a grain of mustard seed. When there is such faith, we can overcome the despair of the times and offer our five loaves and two fish to God for his use as he creates a new history in this land.

As we left for the conference place, a sudden thunderstorm struck. Such a heavy sudden rainstorm is very rare. But in the space of a few minutes the road was flooded. As our bus moved along the flooded road, God's words of invitation come to us. "Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters" and, "I have prepared the best things for the one I love." I have been to many conferences, but I sensed that this time different. I was full of expectations and was looking forward to something great that God would do at this conference. The conference place was prepared as a vacation place for veterans. The director, a captain in the army, was full of soldier spirit, so he and I got along very well. He welcomed us, soldiers of Christ, and prepared a good environment for us.

Shepherd Stas (Computer Science, graduate school) delivered a gracious message based on John 5:1-14. The people lying around the pool of Bethesda were just like the people of the world, full of all kinds of diseases and sinsicknesses. People look strong and healthy on the outside, but on the inside, they have all been pierced by Satan's horn and are infected with the poison of sin and death. They cannot shake off the incurable of despair and anxiety. They are all infected with the sickness unto death. But God had pity on these people of the world and sent his son Jesus to be our Healer and Savior. He bore our sins in his own body on the cross. By his wounds alone we are healed. He binds up our wounds and heals our diseases. He asks, "Do you want to get well? Get up and pick up your mat and walk." All of us answered with the same heart. "Yes, Lord. I want to get well. I want to be healed." "Lord Jesus, you alone know my sicknesses; come and heal me. Lord, I want to live as a healthy man. I want to get away from this pool of Bethesda and breathe the pure, clean air of freedom to my hearts content. Please help me."

"Do you want to get well?" These words changed Shepherd Stas. He was a powerless sinner, full of lustful desires and a competitive spirit, just like the man who had been sick for 38 years. He wanted to live a noble and pure life. But he could not get loose from the power of sin. When he studied this passage in John 5, he heard the voice of Jesus, "Do you want to get well? Get up. Pick up your mat and walk." He is studying computer science in the University of Kiev and he wants to be a leader in this nation. He is bearing basic training very well. Based on this passage in John 5, Andrew Shpagin, Valodya Popelnyukh and Oksana all shared testimonies.

When Oksana (Chemistry 1) gave her testimony she was like a Korean country girl of the 1970's. I thought that this girl who is so beautiful and gentle would not have any problems. But she had despaired because of meaninglessness and her Inferiority complex and she had tried to commit suicide a number of times. When she failed, she began to drink very strong vodka that was 40%-alcohol. Every one was surprised when she confessed this. The bright light of Jesus shined into her dark heart. After she began studying the Bible she did not miss Sunday Worship Service or Early Morning prayer meetings even once.

Shepherd Volodya ( Radiophysics Ph.D. school) delivered the message from Matthew 9:1-13. He comes from a very poor family, so he worked very hard to be number one in everything. In this way, he sought to overcome his fate. So he could enter and graduate from the special technical high school for science which only geniuses can enter. After entering Kiev University, he continued to be number one in his class by studying like a demon. Now he is in graduate school. But he suffered continually because of his competitive spirit and lustful desires. So in his inner heart he was very dark and his inner man was as noisy as a country market place. Through Bible study he met and received Jesus the Light. He began to offer his faithfulness and diligence to the work of the gospel. He has more one-to-one Bible studies than anyone and is growing as a very excellent Bible teacher. While he was preparing his message, he worked at his usual pace to be number one and he suffered from his competitive spirit. He repented of despising other shepherds who did not work as hard as he did. When he repented, he found real peace and freedom. He accepted Jesus who came to call not the righteous but sinners to repentance. And he came to Jesus just as he was.

Shepherd Vladimir Levitsky (Physics 5) gave his message based on John 4:1-30. He is an able and smart young man. In the past he was so thirsty for the truth and true freedom that he came to the Bible study like a drowning man grasping for a straw. Once I suggested that if he cut his ponytail, some great change would come to his life. But he did not listen to me. After this, he could not overcome the power of sin in his life. He stopped studying the Bible. Like the Gerasene demoniac he screamed and tortured himself, and plunged into rock music and sexual immorality. He felt that fear and despair choked his soul and he could not sleep at night. He envied those who slept soundly. He realized that without Jesus his life was racing toward destruction. Finally, as his last hope, he decided to come back to Bible study. He admitted that the Catholic Church, Orthodox Church and other churches, which he had attended, did not satisfy him. He could not find another group like ours. He sincerely repented before Jesus the living water, the one who said, ''I am He.'' Then, strangely, joy and happiness welled up from the depth of his soul. He felt new power flowing into his life. He served this conference with joy like that of the Samaritan woman who, upon meeting Jesus, ran back to the village to tell the village people, ''Come and see.'' He studied and digested John 4 so well. He should get the gold medal for this conference.

While I was listening to his message, I was moved by the good shepherd Jesus. He left the glory and privilege of heavenly kingdom to come to this sinful world and have one-to-one Bible study all day long with the lowly Samaritan woman so that her unquenchable thirst might be quenched. One word of Jesus came to my heart, ''I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep'' (John 10:11). We shed many tears while we meditated and sang hymns about the good shepherd Jesus. Praise God for sending Jesus, the spring of the living water to quench our weary and thirsty souls. Many brothers and sisters wrote and shared testimonies on this message.

1) Shepherdess Maria (Psychology graduate school)

Maria's family is the first shepherd family (house church) in Kiev. She has been faithfully coworking with shepherd Vlad for the last seven years. Maria was thirsty for a father's love. And she suffered from an inferior complex. Once when she was very small she saw her drunken father fling a dirty rag at her mother, then beat her. This really shocked her. Her home was peaceful only when her father went to work. She mostly stayed at home and grew up in fear and isolation. Because she was afraid of being rejected, she couldn't make friends. But she studied diligently and received the gold medal and was accepted into Kiev University. In college she tried to solve her deep dissatisfaction by eating a lot and by indulging her sinful desires. But when she saw her fat, ugly body in the mirror, she despised herself. She called herself a dirty girl. She lived because she couldn't die. Then, one day she met a missionary who invited her to the Sunday Worship Service. When she heard the message the first time, she thought it was nonsense. But Genesis 1: 26 came to her heart. She realized that she must not live at random. She accepted the truth that she was made in the image of God. Through the Bible study she met Jesus who said, ''I am He,'' and tasted overflowing joy. In 1996 she established the first shepherd family with shepherd Vlad. They are truly happy in Jesus. When they were captured by Jesus and lived as shepherds, God's blessing overflowed. Anastasia, Luda and Oksana are their spiritual children. God also blessed them with Little Ivan. She gives thanks to God with tears for changing an instrument of righteousness.

2) Shepherdess Ira (Biology Ph.D. school)

Ira testified that God saved her from a fatalistic life. When she was a child, she had a dream of becoming a ballerina. But her dream was broken when she was found to have laryngeal cancer caused by the Chernobyl nuclear accident. Surgery left her with an ugly scar on her neck. After this she could not love her life and she began to hate things which had destroyed her life. She became very skinny. One day she met a missionary. She was invited to the '94 Summer Bible Conference, where she accepted the love of God through the studied the parable of the lost coin in Luke chapter 15, she realized that she was like the lost coin and God loved her and found her. Right at conference time she had to write her thesis and her wedding with Shepherd Ivan. But she decided to renew the vision, which God had given her to be a source of blessing. She decided not to sit in fatalism but to walk by faith, believing that God would bless the Ukraine through her family.

Shepherd Captain Vitaly delivered the message, "Young Man, Get Up", Luke 7:11-17. He is 34 years old, the oldest bachelor among us. He works as a computer programmer. We call him "Captain" because he is the captain of our soccer team. When he was young, he fell in love with a woman, but one-day she left him and married a rich man. Since then, he has been full of bitterness because of his wounded heart. He cursed his life, saying to himself, "It would have been better not to have been born." He remained unmarried and lived like a man lying in a tomb. He decided to make a lot of money in order to wash away his bitterness. He works as a computer programmer. He was given an important project, and he worked on it unlit 10 p.m. every night. One day, Shepherd Andrew, who works with him at the same company, invited him to Bible study. Shepherd Andrew used to be incomparably shy. Vitaly was amassed to see him boldly teaching the word of God. He wondered what was in the Bible to make this weak man so bold. So he came to a Bible study meeting. He was amazed when he saw such pure young men and women studying the Bible. In his message, he said, "Where on earth, other than in UBF, can we find such pure young people?" Everyone burst out laughing at his comment. He confessed that if he could grow as a man of faith and a good disciple of Jesus, perhaps he could have the hope of marriage. He also said in the message that there were many sorrowful events in this world, but the most sorrowful thing is the spiritual deadness of our young people. It is true that when one's spiritual life is dead, his hope is also dead. There is no future when young men have no hope and vision. If we are to live and if our children are to live, we must not lay on the mat of fatalism and sorrow and despair, but we must get up and pick up our mast and walk. Then, we must throw off crushing burdens of despair and fatalism and live with dreams and hope as young men and women of Christ in this generation. Only the word of Jesus Christ can raise dead young men from their coffins. The word of Jesus has almighty power to raise the dead to live, just as Jesus once raised a dead young man being carried in his coffin to the buried. God who made the heavens and the earth by the word of his mouth can also raise the dead young people of our times and make them a source of blessing, a kingdom of priests and a holy nation. Through this message all of us realized that God does not want us to remain like dead wood, but he wants us to rise up to be fruitful and prosperous. He wants us to live lives that overcome the world. After his message we earnestly prayed that each of us might hear Jesus' voice, "Young man, get up," so that God might bring spiritual revival to our land by raising up all of our young people from spiritual deadness.

1) Marina Marina wrote a poem, "The Cross of Jesus," and recited it at the conference so beautifully. All during the conference, Marina was so nervous, her heart was jumping like a rabbit because of her Russian Orthodox mother who had opposed her coming to the conference. She had to go home before Sunday. But she really wanted to hear just a little more of God's word, so she waited until late Saturday night. She even shared her testimony, and then she went home. She couldn't attend the Sunday Worship Service. When she went home late Saturday night, her mother beat her severely and made her kneel on the floor all night long. We prayed earnestly that God would protect his daughter and give her mother a repentant heart. The day after the conference, Shepherdess Anastasia met her on campus. Marina told her that no matter how painful and severe the punishment was she would continue studying the Bible. She said that in the future she would become a missionary and proclaim the gospel to the world. This girl is young, but she has simple gospel faith. For this reason, I want to help the shepherdesses live together in the common life.

Shepherds Ivan and King Andrew are the web masters and Internet managers of the Kiev UBF. They also shared beautiful testimonies. They are brothers. Ivan came first and studied the Bible. Later he invited his brother Andrew to Bible study. They are very sincere and faithful in small things. They take care of the center so carefully and faithfully.

Shepherd "Great Sasha" delivered the message on 1 Corinthians 15. Shepherd Sasha is a country boy. He came from a small village. In every respect he is excellent. So many people have great expectations for him. His hope was to be very successful in his life and make his poor family prosperous. It was most unusual for a boy from his village to get into high school, but he was selected to enter not just an ordinary high school, but the special physics and math school in Kyiv. When he left for Kyiv, his grandmother held his hands and told him to become a great man like Mikhail Gorbachev. He took his grandmother's words to heart and tried his best to become a great leader like Gorbachev. But he could not overcome his inferioty feelings as a country boy, nor could he overcome the corrupt environment of the city. So he became a prisoner of his lustful feelings. He couldn’t escape this evil power that oppressed him. When he came to college, things got worse. He is a tall and handsome 6'3", but instead of becoming a great man, he became a dirty, petty man-a long way from Mikhail Gorbachev. He longed to rise above the corrupt life that he had fallen into. Then he was invited to the Summer Bible Conference of 1995. There he accepted John 8:11: "Neither do I condemn you. Go now and leave your life of sin." He experienced the grace of forgiveness and true freedom. For the first time in his life he was indeed free. God's grace to him was so great that he gave his heard and energy to taking care of sheep. But strangely, the sheep he fished and taught did not remain. For five years, he repeated this unfruitful shepherd life. Finally, he became fatalistic about himself and thought, "I'm not shepherd material." This time, as he prepared and delivered the Resurrection message, he realized that his faith was not based on simple faith in God's word. He realized that his faith was in his head. He realized that unless he had clear faith in the death of Jesus on the cross and in his resurrection, he could not be a fruitful shepherd. So he accepted Jesus death on the cross for his sins and earnestly prayed that God might raise him to be a great shepherd, a great man like Alexander the Great. When we head his message, we praised the Risen Jesus with all our hearts. We praised Jesus who by his resurrection destroyed the power of death and darkness. He is the Lord of Life, the Lord of Resurrection. We learned that to live by resurrection faith is indeed a blessed life. WE joyfully shouted, "Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?" Thank God for giving us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. All of us were clothed with Resurrection faith and we were full of joy. So on the stop we made a "Five Loaves and Two Fish Orchestra" and praised God with all our strength. The "Five Loaves and Two Fish Orchestra" was composed of Little Joseph, violin 1; Anastasia, violin 2;Kyung sun, violin 3; Vladimer Levitsky, guitar; Sasha, flute; Oksana and Yong Sun, piano.

The last message, "Feed my Sheep" (John 21:15), was delivered by Shepherd Vlad (programmer). This message gave us spiritual direction to follow after the conference. Vlad is a good-hearted man, but he seems to be a little weak. But when he gave delivered this message and gave us direction, he spoke in a strong, clear voice. He spoke with such authority that we realized that feeding sheep is not an option. It is not something we do if we feel like it. It is indeed the last command of our Lord Jesus Christ. Furthermore, these words, "Feed my Sheep," are not words that bind us ith chains or burden our hearts. They are words that lead us to the life that is truly the happy life. The person who has no mission seems to be free and happy, but actually, all of his labor leads but to the grave and his life cannot but is a meaningless life under the curse. Jesus as God gave us the Sabbath to give us real rest and peace, so God gave us mission so that we can be happy. When we heard this message we realized that the mission God has given us is a great blessing and we decided to pray for 100 one-to-ones and 60 attendants to the Sunday Worship Service.

The testimonies given by the freshmen were as follows:

1)Valery (law). Valery's mother is a doctor. He studied well and had many friends, but when he was young he was mugged and traumatized by an evil man. After that, he suffered from mental problems. He started drinking. He felt like a goldfish trying to get out of its bowl. He wanted to be free from everything, but when he looked for unlimited freedom, he only found debauchery, self-destruction, and slavery to his base nature and despair. He lived in the house just below us. In the summer time he put on a heavy KGB overcoat and ran around the streets like a Gerasene demoniac. His mother asked my help every day. I could not do anything for him but pray for him. He came to this Easter Conference for the first time. He wrote a testimony to share. It was the first time. I was afraid that testimony he would hit the table and scream and run out. But he was like a gentle lamb and he shared his testimony quietly. His one word was, "Let's preach the gospel to the ends of the earth." Then he sat down. His one word didn't fit his testimony, but I was so happy that he didn't say something weird and unnecessary. It was a miracle. May God listen to his mother's prayer and heal him.

2) Alyona (Chemistry 1). Alyona shared her testimony based on " Neither do I condemn you." She is a beautiful girl who grew up without any special problems. But once she had high fever of 104 F. Even though she was so sick, her father did not seem to show any interest in her. He only paid attention to her older brother. This made her sorrowful. But she did well in school and became a top student. One day, when she was alone with her grandmother, one relative came and raped her. After this she suffered from shame and self-condemnation. Through this conference she accepted Jesus who does not condemn, but takes away her burden of sin and guilt. She wants to make a new beginning and live as s free woman in Jesus. So she decided to attend Sunday Worship Service and Early Morning prayer meetings regularly.

3) Anna (Chemistry 1). Anna was born in Russia. When she was young, her family moved to the Ukraine, following her father who was a soldier. However when she was nine, her father began to play around with another woman. Her mother continually cried at home. Finally, her parents divorced. Her father came to see her whenever he wanted to and took her out for a walk, then brought her home and disappeared. However, she studied hard and won a gold medal and entered the Chemistry department of Kiev University. She had great expectations about her college life, but she could find no meaning in college. She was lonely, so she made a boyfriend and she gave her heart to him. But this boy was just like her father. He found another girlfriend and abandoned her. Anya was so fatalistic and sorrowful. She was so quiet and introverted that that she could not endure even a little pressure. So she decided to kill herself. She even rehearsed her plan for killing herself. At the time of life when she was most beautiful she was like a smoldering wick, with no hope for her life. But Shepherdess Anastasia visited her again and again and wept many tears, begging her to come to the conference. She couldn't overcome Anastasia's tears, so she decided to try just once more and come to the conference. Almost to the last day, she did not open up and share her problem. Finally, on the last day, the light of Jesus shined into her dark heart. She received John 4:14, "But whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." She was born again. She repented of her plan to end her life and acknowledged the love of Jesus. Other than these there were testimonies by other freshmen, Brother Mikhail and Sister Pauline.

We praise and thank God for pouring out so much grace on us through this conference. Most of all, we praise God for saving the life of one person Anna. Thank God for answering our prayers. All of our hard work was not in vain. The salvation of this one person, Anya, made all of our labor of love and prayer worthwhile. It rained continually, but we saw the rain as God's blessing and evidence of the outpouring of his grace. So we had a wonderful soccer game in this beautiful conference place. After that, we had a shish kebab party outside. My wife, Missionary Sarah Kim, is really a good cook. She used her talents to prepare delicious shish kebab and made us so happy.

In conclusion, I realized that this world needs good shepherds like Jesus. I learned that if I am to raise them as Jesus' disciples I must have a right attitude toward the gospel and toward the word of God. I must endlessly grow myself if they are to grow. God gave me many sheep, but when I look at myself, I am helpless. I can only go before the throne of God and ask his mercy. Personally, I received John 4:13,14: "Jesus answered, 'Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." I earnestly pray that God will help me to follow the good shepherd Jesus and live as a good shepherd who lays down his life for God's sheep. Pray for me to grow as a good shepherd.